Friday, February 27, 2009

Friday Random Thoughts

Woot! Two posts in one week. Heh. How about some random thoughts for your Friday viewing pleasure? I’m sure I’ve got something swimming in my little head.

-I had two near misses this morning on my way to work. I am more convinced than ever that there is an invisible, protective bubble around my car. The first one, I was making a left out of the daycare parking lot as the mini bus was turning in. I looked and didn’t see anyone behind her so I started to go – when I saw a freakin’ taxi fly out from behind her. I went to slam on my brakes – and MISSED the brake pedal. I missed the dude by inches. Then I missed another guy as I backed out of my 7-11 parking space. There was a truck next to me and I couldn’t see. Good thing I was pulling out at a snail’s pace.

-I found out recently that a former friend (and by former, I mean I haven’t spoken to her since I was 18) has her child in the same daycare that I use. We had a falling out over something totally ridiculous, so I wonder if I’ll actually say hello to her next time I see her.

-Speaking of blasts from the past, I ran into someone yesterday in 7-11 that I have not seen or spoken to in YEARS. I dated his friend when I was in 8th grade! I couldn’t believe we even recognized one another.

-My little boy Christopher has a blood blister on his lil’ itty bitty pinky toe. L How on earth does a 4 month old manage that? It’s not like he’s walking, or even wears shoes for that matter! I doubt we’ll ever figure out that mystery.

-Speaking of Christopher’s feet, how stinking cute is this picture?

-Lauren is becoming an expert on bears. She gave me a whole lecture this morning about how you can’t go near a baby bear or it’s mama will attack you, but if you leave the baby alone, the mama won’t attack you. And if you are attacked by a bear, you should play dead. Good to know she’s got that info incase she ever encounters a bear in Hicksville.

-I finished all 4 Twilight books, and was left with an empty, “Now what?” feeling. I’m not ready to let go. So I started over again with the first book. One of these days I’ll get to read Midnight Sun, but it’s kind of a pain in the ass to read 200+ pages as a PDF file. The DVD of Twilight comes out in less than a month. Can’t freakin’ wait.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Man, I really suck at this blogging thing, huh?

I really have no idea how people can come up with enough words to fill a blog every single day. My life really isn't all that interesting, people! But I'll try, because maybe one day I'll look back and laugh.

How about I tell you about Lauren? She's 5, and a million rays of sunshine in my book. Even when she is being the ultimate drama queen. Seriously, do you think that she and her little 5 year old friends have a competition at school to see who can rile up the parents the quickest? Sometimes, she can be the sweetest thing on two legs. And others...well, not so much. Sometimes I really think that her brain is 10 years older than she is, by the attitude that I get. Absolutely, flat out refusing to wear jeans - only skirts or fuzzy pants. Telling me that she'll pack up and move to Grandma Debbie's if she keeps getting into trouble - actually going so far as to pack a nightgown and a bathing suit in her bag and heading for the door. Dra-muh.

She can really be a nice person though, and I hope that keeps up as she gets older. I can see already that she's very empathetic. Sometimes I watch her while she's watching TV, she doesn't know I'm watching, she's in another world. If something "Bad" is happening, she gets this look on her face...I can't describe it with any other word but concern. And she truly, honestly loves her baby brother. It's so sweet to watch her with him - she doesn't even care when he yanks on her hair. I keep telling her she'll regret letting him do that when he gets older and can REALLY yank on it!

Sometimes I try to picture her as a teenager, or as an adult. The thought can almost send me into tears - I almost wish she could stay little forever. Except when she's acting big. ;)

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Tuesday Thoughts

My brain is trying to get back to normal functions after my awesome drunken weekend in lovely Moorestown, NJ. Here are some random thoughts for your Tuesday.

*Cammie wants everyone to sign up for Twitter. I did, but I really don't know WTF it's for.

*I wonder how long it's going to take before I can separate my left arm from the rest of my body. The focker HURTS. But at least my skin tag thingy is gone.

*My husband kicked ass today. He picked Lauren up from school, went grocery shopping and had dinner on the table within 5 minutes of my walking in the door. He also did most of the dishes, emptied the dishwasher and washed all the baby bottles. Rock on.

*Christopher has pretty much been sleeping since 5:45 this afternoon. He woke up to have half a bottle and went right back to sleep. Man, I hope that doesn't bite me in the ass.

*I'm watching American Idol, but I can't really get into it this season. I've been bored with the auditions, and I'm really not feeling anyone. Bleh. It's entirely too time consuming to not be psychotically loved.

*A grape ice and some Doritos would be freaking AWESOME right now.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Not Me Monday...

Ahhh....another Monday.

I did NOT clean up a giant round puddle of melted ice pops off my daughter's carpet. Because she did NOT steal an entire box of ice pops in the middle of the night, not realizing that her room is not a freezer.

I did NOT take the day off of work Friday so that I could dump my kids off at school/daycare and hightail my ass to New Jersey to spend the weekend with my skanky friends.

I did NOT spend nearly two hours driving around suburban New Jersey with Melissa trying to find a liquor store, and we did NOT end up at two different non-liquor store locations before finding an ACTUAL liquor store. We also did NOT spend $85 on alcohol in one trip. We most certainly did NOT consume nearly every drop of said alcohol in one night.

I did NOT consume 5 grape jello shots in the span of 5 minutes. I also did NOT update my Facebook status in the middle of the night to read "Kelly is can not see sttraight line", because I was completely sober.

I did NOT spend my Saturday night with 20 of the best bitches alive on the geriatric short bus. And we did NOT become involved in a bar brawl where 20 ginormous bouncers received the bat signal to come out of the wood work to eject drunken, stupid boys who were all up in our bizness.

I did NOT have the most awesome weekend ever, with the best bitches ever, having the most fun EVER.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Things that make me MAD!

Another shoutout for my good friend Cammie! She always gives me the best ideas. I'm sure I'm just pissy enough today to think of 10 things that make me mad.

1. My menstrual cycle. WTF, man. My cycles have always been ridiculously wonky (some months it's 28, then 32, then 26 - make up your damn mind already). On top of that, they are so stupidly long. I swear, I have the longest periods on the planet. Why can't I get a nice 4 day one like the rest of the world?

2. The scale. Why must it hate me so? I have been doing Weight Watchers on and off since 2002. I know it works, when I actually decide to stick to it. But healthy foods are no freaking fun. Thus, my hatred of the scale. Numbers tend to go up when you have cake for lunch instead of that Lean Cuisine that's sitting in the freezer.

3. Winter. Sorry to "steal" this one from Cammie, but I am right there with her. Winter is the bane of my existence. I don't understand people who enjoy it. Skiing? Why would you want to subject yourself to that? I hate being cold. I hate dressing in layers. I hate having the windows closed and waking up with a nosebleed because the air is so dry. I hate waking up to find that the temperature in the house has dropped to 52 degrees because the oil burner decided to stop working, thus requiring a visit from the oil company at 4am - IF they're available. If I could move to Florida, I'd do it in a heartbeat.

4. When work is slow. Like now. Oh my hell, when there's nothing to do at work, it makes the day draaaaaag. And then I have to look like I'm busy, because I feel all guilty not having anything to do, as if I could make work appear in front of me.

5. Snoring. Specifically, my husband's snoring. The man sounds like a chainsaw gone berserk. I've actually recorded it on video, so that I can show him that he does, indeed, snore. Because when I nudge, er, kick the crap out of him to wake him up so he'll stop, he says "I wasn't snoring". Um, yeah. OK.

6. The fact that my friends live so far away. Yes, another ditto for Cammie. They're all over the country, and none are in NY. I have to drive and/or fly for at least two hours to get to just one of them. I don't get to see them nearly enough. They started out as "internet friends", but over the years they've evolved into the kind of girlfriends you wait your whole life for, and intend to keep for your whole life. These girls are better friends long distance than some people I've known locally for my entire life. And yet none of them will move to NY. The hell?

7. 5:30am. Who knew it was possible for the two hands on a clock to make a person mad? Waking up at 5:30am sucks. No matter how early I go to bed, I'm always dead tired and have a hard time waking up. Why can't I be like all those young 'uns who get to wake up at 7am and still make it to work by 9? Oh yeah, because I have kids.

8. Opinion shovers. People who think that their opinion on politics, religion (or whatever) is THE ONLY WAY TO THINK. You can believe whatever you want. Don't shove it down my throat. You're a republican? Great. You're Catholic/Jewish/Buddhist? Awesome. Leave me out of it. I suck at debating so even if your opinion is wrong, I won't win. So I won't debate with you OR listen to you ramble on about it.

9. Friends who are not friends. Luckily, I don't have any of these in my life at the moment - at least I don't think I do! But someone who is nice to your face and then talks crap about you when you're not there, or someone who only thinks about themselves. Or someone who won't stick up for you when you need it. Getting these kinds of people out of my life was the best thing I've ever done.

10. Seeing pictures of dead "babies" who were killed fighting this pointless war in Iraq/Afghanistan. These soldiers died for their country before they ever even had a chance to live. 19 years old, being killed by a roadside bomb? Where's the justice in that? We're fighting a war that never should have started.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

In Memory of Casey 1994-2009

Last night, my family lost a beloved member. Casey, our 14 year old, black and white lovebug of a cat went to meet the angels in heaven. He was just about the sweetest cat you could ever imagine. And he loved me like I was his momma, even though I wasn’t in his life until he was 3 years old.

Casey, along with his brother Tiny, was adopted by Jason back in 1994 when he first moved to NY. When I met Jason in 1997, I immediately fell in love with his “boys”. When Casey decided to take a little vacation a couple of years later, it scared the hell out of us. I made “missing cat” posters to hang around the neighborhood. Turns out he’d just been visiting a neighbor down the street who had a nice stash of cat food for him whenever he wanted. But that was the end of his adventuring days – we decided at that point that we could no longer let Casey and Tiny wander around outside.

Casey was a cuddle bug. He would come and lay with just about anyone that would have him (except for Lauren). And when I say cuddle, I really mean that he would lay clear across your neck if you’d let him. But he’d usually settle for getting as close to you as possible, and just purr away. His dislike for Lauren was pretty humorous. He knew when she was coming, and he’d make a run for it. He’d cuddle with me in the mornings, but the minute he’d hear her feet hit the floor upstairs, it was his cue to get under the bed. If he was off his game and didn’t get away quick enough, he’d just hiss at her to make his point. Lauren loved him, even if he’d never let her near him.

This past Saturday afternoon, Casey was curled up on my bed. I went over to give him some love, and I noticed that something wasn’t quite right with him. He was skinnier than he was even a week ago. The beautiful green/yellow color to his eyes wasn’t there – his pupils were so large that you just couldn’t see the color at all. His third eyelids were up. He seemed to have a lot of goo in his eyes, which Jason cleaned out. And there was an odd smell to him. Even so, he was just as snuggly as ever. I made the decision at that point to take him to the vet on Monday. Sunday was more of the same – although he was still walking around, migrating between his favorite spots in the house – up against the radiator in Christopher’s room, the corner by the end table in the living room, anywhere on my bed (especially if there was another warm body there). Sunday night he came up on my bed as I watched TV, and we cuddled for a long time. Normally, if I was going to sleep, I’d move him so I could have my space. But that night, I let him stay as long as he wanted, and just listened to him purr.

Monday morning sent up huge red flags for me. Casey had spent most of the night laying on the couch after he left my bed. Lauren came downstairs – he didn’t move. Lauren went and sat right next to him – and again, he didn’t move. This was very unlike him. I sat and petted him for a while before we left for work/school, took a few pictures.

Finally, Jason and I met at home to pick Casey up for his appointment. He wasn’t very happy to be in that carrier, and he was pretty vocal about it on the way there. The look on Dr. Larry’s face when he laid eyes on Casey did not bode well. The poor little guy was in bad shape. He was severely dehydrated, his kidneys had all but stopped functioning. He felt one, possibly two masses in his abdomen. He basically told us that there isn’t much he can do without putting him through more pain. He could pump him full of fluids, but it would only prolong the inevitable. Casey had reached the end of the road. We made the heartbreaking decision to euthanize him, to end his misery. It was nearly impossible to be in the room, but we had to be. I couldn’t let him be by himself. I needed him to see that we were there for him, that we loved him. It was a longer process than normal, he had next to no blood pressure so they had trouble getting a vein. But once they were in, his pain was ended quickly. We decided to have him cremated privately, and his ashes will be returned to us.

Losing a pet is one of the worst things I’ve ever had to endure in my life. It’s losing a family member. But, as Dr. Larry says, it’s good that we are able to do this for our four-legged friends, when we cannot for our two-legged friends. We have to know that we did the right thing for him. Jason is utterly devastated, having never been down this road before. I’ve never seen him this way, in the entire 12 years that I have known him. He feels guilty and is wondering if we waited too long, if we made the right decision. And Lauren, well, I’m not sure how much she really understands. I explained it to her as best I could, telling her that he was very sick and the angels came to get him. She keeps repeating “Casey died…” but she’s asked a few times when he’s coming back. She got very upset when she saw how upset Jason was. She’s very empathetic, that little girl.

So that’s my Casey’s story. Rest in Peace, Sweet Casey-poo. We love you more than you will ever know. And we will meet you again on that Rainbow Bridge.

Here are some pictures from some happier times...

Monday, February 2, 2009

NOT ME Monday

Another installment of NOT ME Monday. I really should change the name of this thing to since these are the only thing I manage to post.

I did NOT gain .2 pounds this week at WW.
I did NOT make a conscious decision to screw WW yesterday, when Jason’s uncle showed up at my door with cocktail weenies and 2 bags of Doritos. I also did NOT make a beeline for my pantry to bust out my own bag of Sweet & Spicy Chili Doritos, and I most certainly did NOT polish off the bag.
I did NOT spend hours and hours folding children’s laundry yesterday. My children do NOT have more clothes than God.
I did NOT buy a t-shirt that says “I heart Boys Who Sparkle”.
I am NOT counting down the days until my girls only weekend coming up. I also did NOT threaten to start drinking now in anticipation of the event.