Friday, March 20, 2009

Friday Random Thoughts

TGIF, man.

-Back twist #1 - Last night I did it carrying a screaming, 40 lb, 5 year old drama queen up the stairs to put her in her room. That was fun.

-Back twist #2 – This morning I did it while carrying Christopher in his Snugride into his classroom at daycare. I can’t see my feet in front of me while I’m carrying him, and I tripped over a toddler during the Mass Toddler Exodus of 2009. Toddlers everywhere, making their way down the hall. I didn’t see one, I tripped over her and knocked her down, knocking myself into the wall in the process of trying not to step on said toddler.

-Twilight comes out on DVD tonight at midnight! I thought of finding one of those DVD release parties, but chances are I’d be the oldest one there and the teenage screaming might give me a headache. I’ll pick it up tomorrow.

-I’m super excited about the Twilight DVD. D-nice is coming over tomorrow night for a Twilight/Wii party and some takeout. I love food, I love Wii, I love Twilight. Kick ass.

-I was super Weight Watcher this week. I exercised (well, I did the Wii Fit – that has to count, right?) 5 days out of the week (counting tonight). I wrote down everything I put in my mouth. I even weighed and measured. Hell, I ate fruit more than once a day for most of the week. And I think I’ve used ½ of a flex point. Awesome. I better have lost like, 6 pounds.

-Christopher is getting to be a big boy and I’m having to wean him from the super awesome SwaddleMe blanket. He’s too big for the largest size, and he keeps busting out of it. So last night he slept with one arm out. Slept through the night, thankyouverymuch.

-Today is the first day of Spring!!! The days of sandals and capris are coming up quickly. So can someone tell my why the hell I woke up to SNOW?! Luckily none of it stuck. But still. Apparently Mother Nature didn’t get the memo.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

I love my kids, but I drink a little.

Sometimes I really wonder if Lauren has an alternate personality or something. She can go from Jekyll to Hyde in 3.4 seconds. Or, she’ll have an absolutely awesome day where I think she’s just the greatest kid ever, and then the following day she’ll be a nightmare. Such is the drama of a 5 year old diva, I suppose.

Case in point. The other day, she woke up (at 6:30am – a little early for my taste but it beats 5:30) and came downstairs into my room like always. Except she was all dressed in matching clothes. St. Patrick’s Day t-shirt, jeans, and matching shamrock socks. #1 wow. Then she took it upon herself to go into the freezer, get out her pancakes and cook her own breakfast. Brushed her teeth, posed for some freakin’ adorable pictures, done. Off to school in a great mood. Played on the Wii after school, gave herself a bath, bedtime was a breeze (till she couldn’t find her game…but I digress).

Then there was yesterday. Little Miss Houdini woke up at about 6am and decided that it was a great idea to go to school right then. At 6am, when it was still dark outside and the school is locked down for another 2.5 hours. Mmmmmkay. I stepped out of the shower just in time to hear the chime that goes off when a door is opened. I freaked, thinking that both my kids are still asleep, and Jason is already gone. The hell? I cracked the door open and called for Lauren, who answered me – it was her opening the door. What the holy crap? What if I’d gotten out of the shower 1 minute later and she was gone? How do I keep this little Houdini in the house? She knows how to open the deadbolt. She can also probably work the hook and eye latch we have over her head on the screen door (she’d need to pull a chair over for that, though). My next step is probably a chain on the very top of the door where she absolutely can’t reach, but I’d have to get up at 4am to re-latch it after Jason leaves. Argh. Then it was attitude all morning. Fun times. Love that kid, but man she makes me want to drink sometimes.

I wonder if I’m in for it with Christopher too. Right now he’s such a laid back, easy kid. Always happy and smiling unless he’s hungry. Feed him a bottle and he’s back to his sunny self. Loves his sleep. He seems to be eating more and more these days, which his sister NEVER did. Last night he had a full jar of carrots (the child who has had carrots four times in his life) and then sucked down an EIGHT ounce bottle before bed. I don’t think Lauren ever had an 8 ounce bottle, even when she was a year old. The kid is a rock star. I’m going to pay for this when he’s 16, aren’t I?

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Little Pet Peeves

This is for Melissa. Love her! And I don't want to be yelled at like Cammie was.




I, unlike Miss Happy Pants Cammie, can usually find something to be pissed about, despite my use of happy pills. Guess mine don't work as well as hers do. Oh well!

-Again with the contacts. Didn't we go through this last week? Focking blurry contacts. These are even fresh ones, I didn't even sleep in them. Dammit.

-People who change the rules, don't tell you about it and then delay your shit because you didn't know the new rules.

-Melissa's little HTML tag thingy from her blog to copy and paste her little pissed off thingy up there. Didn't work. I had to it my own way. Fix it, Mel.

-My stupid medicine cabinet door is on my shit list today. Poor Lauren woke up, got herself dressed in matching, unwrinkled clothes (even matching socks!) and came downstairs all ready to rock. Made her own breakfast, etc. Miss independent, she is. Then she went to brush her teeth and sliced her head open on the focking corner of the cabinet door. Let me tell you, scalp cuts BLEED. A Lot. And when you have a 5 year old who freaks at the sight of blood, this is not a good thing. Ruined her whole damn morning. Stupid sharp mirrored cabinet door has some nerve hurting my baby.

-Diets. Yeah, yeah - it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change. I got it. But it still sucks when I have to change the way I eat in order to change the size of my arse. And it sucks even more when I'm focking starving and my only choice is to starve because I won't have enough points left for dinner. Something tells me that the baggie of strawberries I have won't hold me over.

-The new Facebook layout. Geezoman, does it suck. Why do I need to see that my friend gave beer to 26 of her friends? Just tell me that so and so gave a beer to 26 friends - you don't have to tell me their names in separate posts. I don't see all my other friends' statuses because of this crap. Hopefully enough people will complain and they'll change it back.




Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Be Impressed.

I can't believe that I'm even thinking about this. I'm thinking about training to run a 5K.

Here's the thing. I can't run down the street. I've never been a runner, ever. I didn't even have to run the mile in high school. I had bad knees and a doctor's note. When I run, even when I jog as slow as I can, it feels like my joints are going to dislocate and my chest hurts. So yeah, I don't run.

But my good friend Andrea lost her husband in a tragic work-related accident last November. She, along with the company he worked for, are sponsoring a 5K in his honor in August. At first, I just wanted to be there for moral support for her and for my other girlfriends who are participating. Then I thought, maybe I could walk it. I could totally walk 3.2 miles. Then I thought about my BFF Ryann. Despite not being a runner, she ran a 13.1 mile half marathon to benefit Cystic Fibrosis. If she can train to run 13, I can train to run 3. She inspired me to do it. And I want to do it for Andrea, for Matt, and for their two beautiful kids. So here I go...

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Tuesday Annoyances

Today wasn't bad, but I'm always sure to find something that pissed me off!

-My freaking contacts. They're all itchy and burny, for no apparent reason. All damn day I keep squeezing my eyes shut, rubbing, etc. One of these days I'll grow some balls and schedule that Lasik surgery...one day.

-This stupid bandaid that's on my right middle finger. I dontated blood tonight (go me!), and I have a bandaid on my finger from where they gave me the anemia test. No anemia, just a stupid annoying bandaid. I'll be even more pissed if I have a reaction to it like the last time I wore one.

-The weather. It's a tease. 60's and gorgeous over the weekend, cold enough to snow right now. Where the hell is spring already??

-My throat. I was eating Doritos today (which leads me to another thing that pisses me off...the size of my ass...but I digress). As I swallowed one, it went down my throat with the pointy side out, scraping the shit out of the left side of my throat on its way down. So I have half a sore throat. I guess it's better than a whole sore throat, but whatever.

See? I guess it was a good day, since I really couldn't think of all that many things that pissed me off!

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Not Me Monday

-Today is NOT my 32nd birthday. That's because I'm turning 29 for the 4th year in a row.

-I did NOT buy a pregnancy test last week, while shuddering in fear that I would end up with two children 13 months apart. Yay for false alarms!

-My coworker did NOT buy me a 5 pound bag of gummy cherries for my birthday, and I have NOT been devouring them every damn day for the past week.

-I did NOT seriously consider ditching my boss at the Columbus, OH airport and take off in Cammie's super cool Honda Odyssey.

-I did NOT introduce kickass Cammie to said boss...and I also did NOT have to explain how I met her. Yeah, my boss met one of my crazy "internet" friends...the craziest one to boot. No, he doesn't think I'm a freakin' lunatic.

-I am NOT typing this out two days early, and I'm NOT sitting here staring at the utter mess that is my bedroom. I'm NOT supposed to be cleaning my house in preparation for MIL's visit tomorrow.

-I did NOT leave my Weight Watchers meeting on Saturday and make a beeline to Bagel Boss.

Friday, March 6, 2009

Friday Random Thoughts

Happy Friday, y'all! Except now it's Saturday...so I'm posting a day late. Sue me.

-TGI freakin' F. I can't wait for this week to be over! The MIL is coming to visit on Sunday for the week. Should be fun! And my berfday is Monday - happy 32 to me!

-I went to Columbus, OH yesterday for a meeting at Bath & Body Works with my boss. I am jealous. They have a BBW AND a White Barn Candle store in their lobby. And it smells all pretty. There are grounds to walk, a lake to sit by, and a kickass cafeteria. My building doesn't even have a vending machine.

-By far the BEST part of my visit to Columbus was the hour I got to spend at the airport bar with Cammie!! I love that bitch. I do have to say though, it was odd to have my boss meet one of my crazy "internet" friends...and then having to explain how we met. Interesting.

-As I mentioned earlier, Monday is my 32nd birthday. I can't believe I'm so old! I've been hinting (ok, well not so much hinting) at my need for an iPod Touch. The husband says no, what else do I want? Money. $300 to be exact. So I can go buy my iPod touch.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

How am I raising a teenager already?

Lauren, Lauren, Lauren. Are all 5 year old girls really 16 in their brains? I am SO in for it when she's an actual teenager. Let's review:


-16 year old attitude? Check. "Mom, you are SO mean! Howcome you get to do whatever you want and I don't get to do ANYTHING?! (sob sob sob)"


-16 year old mannerisms? Check. Eye rolling, dirty looks, hands on hips, sighs of contempt.


-16 year old phone tendencies? Check. Most nights, she will bring me the phone and ask me to dial Grandma Debbie's phone number in Florida. Last night, she disappeared into her room with the phone for over half an hour. Who knows what they talk about, but she's hilarious while she's doing it. She talks about "your land" when she talks about Florida, and "my land" when she talks about home. They've also made plans to do all her homework together while daddy and I get to "relax".







Monday, March 2, 2009

NOT ME Monday

Happy Monday...yeah right. Here's a list of all the things I did NOT do over the past week or so.

*I did NOT allow my son to sleep in his swing nearly every night for the past week. Sleep...screaming baby...tough choice.

*I did NOT sit in the rocking chair with Christopher at 4am and list in my head all the reasons I HAVE to go to work.

*I did NOT skip my Weight Watchers meetings for the past month.

*I did NOT ask my husband for an iPod Touch for my birthday, because I did NOT just get a new Nano for Mother's Day last year.

*I am NOT debating putting Christopher in a snowsuit and sticking him in a snow drift for some pictures.

*I did NOT say "Now What?" after finishing Breaking Dawn. I also did NOT start reading Twilight over again, because I was totally ready to let go.

*I did NOT give away the ending to Breaking Dawn to a friend that hasn't read it yet. No really, I didn't.

*It's 7am and I am NOT sitting here with a towel on my head watching the weather report yet again instead of getting ready to go to the office that is NOT FOCKING CLOSED.

*I am NOT at all bitter that even though Jason cleaned my car off before he left for work this morning, and shoveled me a path to get to said car, that he's not here to clean it off again...because it's NOT covered in focking snow again.