Not Me Monday

-Today is NOT my 32nd birthday. That's because I'm turning 29 for the 4th year in a row.

-I did NOT buy a pregnancy test last week, while shuddering in fear that I would end up with two children 13 months apart. Yay for false alarms!

-My coworker did NOT buy me a 5 pound bag of gummy cherries for my birthday, and I have NOT been devouring them every damn day for the past week.

-I did NOT seriously consider ditching my boss at the Columbus, OH airport and take off in Cammie's super cool Honda Odyssey.

-I did NOT introduce kickass Cammie to said boss...and I also did NOT have to explain how I met her. Yeah, my boss met one of my crazy "internet" friends...the craziest one to boot. No, he doesn't think I'm a freakin' lunatic.

-I am NOT typing this out two days early, and I'm NOT sitting here staring at the utter mess that is my bedroom. I'm NOT supposed to be cleaning my house in preparation for MIL's visit tomorrow.

-I did NOT leave my Weight Watchers meeting on Saturday and make a beeline to Bagel Boss.